Joe Mosby: Conversations, not recordings, wanted

It is nothing new, the irritation over unsolicited, unwelcome, irritating automated telephone calls. Modern technology has allowed this alleged progress so a company or a political candidate can make thousands of calls in the blink of an eye.

My druthers are that if somebody wants to talk to me or pass along a message, then do it one on one, the way conversations are supposed to be structured.

In mid-afternoon the other day, two calls came in nearly back to back. Both were recordings. One said it concerned my credit card. The other said it concerned my prescription insurance.

So I listened.

In both cases the voices were heavily accented, and in both cases my name was mispronounced.

The irritation quickly rose with one call when the recorded voice instructed me to "please say yes or no" then paused. I said "yes." The recorded voice said, "That is not an acceptable answer." Holy digital dialing, what is not acceptable about "yes" when that was one of two choices?

I quickly punched the 0 on the phone dial, a tactic that often puts you in touch with a real live person. Nope. Not this time. The call ended with the heavily accented voice still talking, and it wasn't me who hung up.

Minutes later the second one came in.

My name was mispronounced again. There is nothing difficult about my name. The voice again opened with "important message" then rattled off something and, lo and behold, gave that option of yes or no answer. I answered yes. The voice said speak louder. I practically shouted yes. The voice told me that answer was not acceptable. Then the voice instructed me to call this toll-free number. So I listened and wrote it down.

A standard toll-free number is 11 digits 1-800-123-4567. The voice rattled off 14 digits. Good grief, where was this call coming from?

Someone or several someones will tell me that I am living in the past, that automated phone calls, robo-calls, are today's business in operation. My contention is that the phone in my house is mine. When you call it, you are knocking on my door in a sense. I should be courteous enough to listen, then to either invite you in or to politely decline. If I say no, then the phone conversation should end.

Once, some years ago, a sales pitch came over the phone, and I listened to it. Right away I knew I was not interested, but I listened. This was a live person, a female. When she came to the closer line where she asked me to OK the order or whatever, I replied, "No, thank you." She had a quick response to that. I again said "No, thank you" and added, "Thank you for calling." She yelled out, "Don't you dare hang up the phone. Don't you dare." I said, "Goodbye" and hung up.

No, few telemarketers lose their cool like that. And I have no problem with real, live sales people phoning me on occasion. But like many folks around here, the volume of such calls got too much a few years back, and I signed up on the "Do Not Call" list.

The calls dwindled from many to very few.

Now unsolicited calls are increasing as schemers have figured out ways around the Do Not Call restrictions. One such gimmick is to open the conversation with "Thank you for calling. Stand by. Our representatives will be with you shortly" implying that you made the call and not the other way around.

Mosby can be contacted by e-mail at jhmosby@cyberback.com.